Memories still linger.

Marriage is a union of two souls. Pledging love to each other and vowing to stay together through thick and thin. It is a life long journey, where by two people trying to complete each other. It is a challenge to create and build true and everlasting love between them, for you can never find true love anywhere but inside your heart. The struggle to preserve the sanctity of the marriage is the main priority of any married couple.

Then come the children. They never asked to be born. But we tried and persisted, and out they came. One after another. And we shifted our energy and focus towards upbringing them, to nurture them, to provide the best we could so that they have a better childhood experience than we were.

So, our married life becomes more complete with their arrivals. Children always expect their parents to be like a superman or superwoman. They expect us to know everything. Sometimes they challenge our nerves, sometimes our intelligence. Sometimes they play trick on us. No matter what, we love them. They might forget about their roots, yet we still love them. And sometimes they question our stand on an issues, yet we still love them. The parental love is sometimes beyond explanation. Sometimes we as parents we simply can't understand the extend other parents take to show their love for their children. Being overly protective, I personally think is not good. There are limits to what and we can profess our love to our children.

While going through our daily routines, we are tested in many ways. A phone call late at night from the police or hospital send shivers through our spine. Or a diagnose confirmed our fears. Adjustments have to be made. Living a daily life has become a chore. Priorities changed overnight. Faith are seriously tested. Hope is all we've got.

Try as we may, ALLAH's will is beyond us. Suddenly, you are going to carry on without your spouse. The obscure feeling, being hollow, all at one might derail your plan for the future. We accept what happened in good faith. To ALLAH we pray so that we will be amongst HIS blessed servant.

Everybody dies. The question is when and how. Life goes on, though full or uncertainties. Your children now have one parent less. You have to be strong for them. They seem a little bit loss. You miss your spouse, hey miss their father/mother even more. You cried, they cried. It takes sometimes to get over it, but the memories linger.

You decided its about time to move on with life. The searching for a new partner is on. Careful considerations about the children's feeling is paramount. It is between your need for a partner in life and their opposing to it. They see it as a betrayal on your part. But then, children don't understand the need of an adult. Certain needs can be provided by the children, or siblings, parents and relatives. But that special need to love and to be loved by the opposite sex, only a partner in life can provide.

By writing this, I think now I understood what happened to my brother and his four children. So my brother lost his wife to cancer and his children lost their mother. It was heart wrenching moment when my brother stuttered over the phone telling me 'kak daimah dah tak da'. I was lost for words, not that I and my brother were talking quite often though. But that weird moment when silence was so deafening.

So yesterday, Feb 4 th, my brother remarried. It is good that he has found a new love. I hope that they'll happily with true love. And for his children, I also hope that they can accept their father's new bride and give her a chance. Fret not, his wife is not a replacement for your beloved mother. You and your mother shared a beautiful life together and no one can take that away from you. No one can. Not in a thousand years.

To arwah Kak Daimah, may ALLAH showers you with HIS blessings.

Memories still linger.